Is Eva Actually the Villain in 'We Need to Talk About Kevin'?

Okay, so I just re-watched 'We Need to Talk About Kevin' (again...I know, I might have a problem) and I'm still completely floored by Tilda Swinton's performance. Absolutely gut-wrenching. But this time, something different struck me. We're obviously meant to sympathise with Eva, she's living every parent's worst nightmare. But what if... what if she's not as innocent as the film makes her out to be? Hear me out. I'm not saying Kevin isn't a psychopath--he definitely is. But there are so many scenes where Eva is actively repressing Kevin, or outright hostile towards him. Remember when she deliberately hurts his arm while they're in the park as a baby, and gets angry when he cries? Or when she refuses to acknowledge him or play with him as a young boy? What if her behaviour fueled his psychopathy, at least in part? I think the film is intentionally ambiguous about it, to be honest. We only see Kevin through Eva's perspective (memory). And memory is notoriously unreliable. Maybe Eva is unconsciously painting herself as more of a victim than she actually was. Maybe she doesn't consciously think she was a bad mom, but deep down she knows she didn't treat Kevin right. Does that excuse Kevin's actions? Absolutely not. But it makes you wonder if the film is really just about a monstrous child, or about the toxic relationship between a mother and son--a relationship where both parties are at fault. I know this is a dark take, and I don't want to victim blame. But Swinton's acting choices are SO nuanced, there's a constant undercurrent of guilt and self-loathing. It makes you wonder if she's not just grieving the victims, but also acknowledging her own culpability. What do you guys think? Am I totally off base here?